Photo Credit: Jon Tyson, Unsplash.com

Written by Kate Solis Silva
April 17, 2020

Things were going great in my career. Until they weren’t. Nothing had changed significantly with the work I was doing five years ago, but to say I was a hot mess internally is putting it gently. And for the life of me, no matter how much I ruminated to understand why, what was next, and/or what the end-all solution was, I was stuck.

Like can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel stuck. Enjoy the journey? No joy in this journey for sure. Trust the process? You gotta be kidding me. Can’t you see I’m sinking in quicksand here? I wanted certainty.

At some point in my descent down into the analysis paralysis rabbit hole, the Universe stepped in. And–as it always does–it showed me exactly what I needed when I needed it most:

Reconnecting to Good Ol’ Me

Reconnecting to me took on a few different forms: career coaching, meditation classes, and learning more about spirituality. But even that was a struggle at first.

To begin, I had no experience with coaching (insert my future self’s shock here!). Meditation to quiet my internal chatter was a rocky start; sitting in stillness for five minutes felt like an eternity. And, wait, spirituality was opening my eyes to the reality that I didn’t need to have it all figured out right now? Connecting to a higher purpose and knowing the answers would come was Blowing. My. Mind.

I was skeptical, but I was at a point where I was willing to try anything. Because so far, my only solutions were talking ad nauseum without taking any action, distracting and procrastinating with the best of ‘em, and denying that I needed to close that chapter. All of it had me ready to burst.

The long and short of it was that the experience seriously changed my life and I’m now on the other side of the fence as a career coach. But this piece isn’t just about the wrap-it-up-in-a-bow happy ending or external outcome. It’s about what I learned to be true in times of uncertainty.

Slowly but surely, introspection, stillness, and spirituality began to reveal my next steps. What??? At first, I was sure if I could just keep thinking about it a little bit harder and longer, things would become clear. But as time went on, doing less and being more were making things clearer.

I started to take baby steps in building practices. Meditating for short stints with consistency. Finding and getting involved in spiritual communities. Hiring another coach to continue to grow. 

Along the way, concepts like everything is always working out for my highest good and the answers are always inside you completely rocked my world.

No, seriously.

What if instead of trying to overthink my way through career and life, I could find answers via space, stillness, and surrender? Insert the brain explosion emoji right here.

Turns out what I needed most during what I lovingly refer to as my “career awakening” wasn’t just figuring out what I’d be doing next. I needed a new approach to life. I needed a plan that had me trusting in myself and something greater than me. My career awakening wasn’t linear, and it included a lot of trial and error. Things that started sounding right in theory didn’t fit in reality. But over time, I began to find my path. 

For example, I’d tried giving meditation a go several times before. Then I began taking an in-person meditation course, which provided more structure and accountability. Having class once a week and meditating for twenty minutes most days was doable.

The course held me accountable, while also honoring my key values of connection and community. And as the weeks went on, it was something I began looking forward to. I was calmer. The mental clutter was starting to clear. I was starting to hear my own voice. I kept showing up. 

In addition to connecting deeper to myself, I got serious about finding a community with like-minded people who could help me move forward in my career and my spiritual life. I met others in my career coaching program that were figuring out their own new chapters. Through this community, I realized that I wasn’t alone; we really can grow and evolve!

I also continued my search for a spiritual home. After being on a lot of spiritual community “dates,” I finally found one that clicked. Being with others that were seeking connection to something bigger than myself fueled my energy and kept me moving forward. 

I want to shout from the rooftops to anyone who’s at a crossroads that gaining clarity wasn’t an overnight event. There was a long process of eliminating no’s to get to my yeses.

When I look back at that time of my life, a lot of it involved just showing up and trying. Even though I was pretty uncertain about a lot of things, I knew that I no longer wanted to stay where I was. So I kept moving. I kept exploring. I kept tuning in and committed to being on the path. 

Five years later, I’m proud to say that my meditation and spiritual practices are the foundation of my life. They not only guide me personally, but they’re also a part of my coaching philosophy. I’m also surrounded by and work with badass coaches that hold me accountable, push me out of the nest when needed, and champion the heck out of me on the regular.

My career awakening taught me that it wasn’t about finding my forever fit, but the fit that was best for me at that time. I get to evolve and change. I allow and am open to what may come up along the way. I even embrace what was previously unthinkable and—gasp!—trust the process.

Because now I know that even in times of uncertainty, I know what’s certain for me.

Photo Credit: Jon Tyson, Unsplash.com

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