What is at the heart of what matters most to you? What are your core values?

When we become more aware of our conditioned mind, we can be more conscious not only of how we interact with others but of how we communicate with ourselves. The more we do this we can connect with our core values, and we can see we are focusing on things we never intended to. Niurka approaches human potential through the lens of our self-talk, and the actions it has us take.

Our guest on the Living the Dream Virtual Summit, Niurka, is a transformational leader, and author of the book, Supreme Influence: Change Your Life with the Power of the Language You Use. As a master trainer of Evolved NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming), she has led thousands of people to live more freely and courageously. She is a mentor, trainer, and world-class speaker, and has worked side by side with Tony Robbins, and other luminary leaders.


She sees a vision and an inspiration of what we’re being called forth to create. It is the essence, without the limitations of how it should happen, and letting go of the attachment. Trying to control the result extinguishes your creative powers. Living the dream is tuning into this dream at the level of essence, and then manifesting that reality. Our vision often stems from what’s in our head, and our dream can be liberated by, or constrained by that. Everything is possible, but the way our brain processes the information is that we filter through our conditioning from childhood. When we become aware, we can realize we are not who we were told we were growing up and can step into the space of possibility.


If you look at a map, it is the distilled version of the roads, the landmarks, and what is essential, but it is not the totality of the area. To process information, we delete details to try to focus on what we need to know. These deletions result from what we were taught in childhood. If we think we are not good enough to do something, we cannot see it as a possibility for us. Those early experiences tell us what we should or should not focus on, and it is a limiting view of who we are and what we can accomplish in the world. It is an illusion of what reality is, yet we view the map of our life as all we can do. When you are young, and someone says you can’t do something, you hear it as truth, and your subconscious mind stores these viewpoints away, and shapes who you become as an adult.


With attachment, we are attempting to get something, by attaching to an idea, or a physical item. Attachment pre-supposes a lack of something. To connect with the present, in the realm of gratitude, there is only oneness at the subatomic level. We can then let go of attachment, and connect with the field of possibility. Being attached to a relationship creates codependency. You can open up to the flow of life, or the inward fluency when we can be fully present. In the moments in life where you are truly free, you are not looking for anything, and you do not lack anything.


Supreme influence is the authentic you, and Niurka defines it as inward fluency. Influence is not getting someone to do what you want them to, but at its core, it is about being so aligned with who you are that you manifest experiences in life that are in alignment with that. This kind of influence does not mean having power over something, as that kind of power is based on fear. Our real power comes from within and needs nothing to exist. Words like “I need to,” “I have to,” I must,” I should,” limit us and create obstacles to living a life based on what we want. When we focus inward, and our head and heart are in alignment, we project confidence, and we can communicate that. There is then a sense of availability about you, and an expanded awareness that is palpable. You are tuned into the highest embodiment of what is possible in life. It’s a continual journey and not a destination. By having morning practices that balance you, your inward fluency has you be an active participant in your life, rather than merely being reactive to what happens around you.


When you talk, your words have power. The language you use, and the choices you make affect your reality. If you knew there was no gap between what you say, and what happens, how would you change the way you communicate? Everything you say contains presuppositions that signal your brain to delete what is not in alignment with what you are saying. If you want to stop doing something, stop talking about it. Say what you do want, versus complaining about what you do not want. You can also see what someone’s core values are within five minutes, just by being aware and listening to them.


Behavior is a function of our subconscious. If you are driving somewhere, and you automatically get off at an exit you often use, that is your autopilot mode of behavior that has taken over. Our subconscious uses deductive reasoning. If people say that something is “difficult,” or “too hard,” then your subconscious believe that. It follows the orders created by your conscious mind. To break out of that, you can consciously choose to communicate in a way that helps you move forward, to be positive, you learn to be very aware of what you speak after the words “I am.” Those words determine what you create and become. Pause before you communicate, to make sure your words are in alignment with what you want to attract. We are always in process. If we limit ourselves by saying “I am overweight,” or “I am stubborn,” then we limit what we can be in the future.


If you are experiencing a rollercoaster of results when you focus on a particular area, such as trying to lose weight, get healthier, or be more productive, take a look first at the results you are getting. Results come from our behaviors, and the beliefs and core values we have influenced our actions, our communications, and how we show up. If we are attempting to create change by behaving a certain way, but our core values conflict with that, the subconscious will win out.

We are all connected to the same life force. When we realize we are all one, and there is unity, we see that the conversation can change to connectedness. When we wake up to the love within, all is possible.

Written by Bridget Baker
Photo Credit: Lucas Lenzi, Unsplash.com