Photo Credit: Yeshi Kangrang,

I was recently inspired by a conversation I had with Aaron Rose (One Idea Away | Episode 180). We talked about how our external reality mirrors our inner stories, and how we need to be willing to look at those stories and evolve them to reflect the ends we wish to experience. 

As these conversations tend to do, it got me thinking . . . 

I’ve had the story of needing to be self-reliant. This story helped me excel in school and business, and left me feeling very much alone and isolated. 

I’ve had the story of needing to figure it out, which gave me motivation and left me with a never-ending list of issues that were always a step away from being resolved, with more stacking up to be tackled and stressed over. 

I’ve had the story of needing to be the provider and security for my family, and devoted myself to my work which left me with too little time–and far too little energy and patience–for my sweet children and exceptionally patient wife. 

I’ve had the story of achievement and the feeling of worth and satisfaction it creates; this led me to wonderful experiences that were as fleeting as a rainbow. It left me hollow, with no identity to hold onto for comfort. It brought me back to the original story of “am I good enough?”

Our inner stories create what we see and how we choose to live.

Aaron, in the interview, reminded me of Gandhi’s belief that the means (our stories, beliefs, and actions) need to reflect the ends (our vision, our goals) we wish to create.

Makes sense, right?

How could it be any other way? How can you get a loving, healed, and whole future (for instance), if your means and journey there don’t include love, healing, and wholeness?

And so my last several years have been devoted to creating and aligning my story and actions with the future I wish to live into. I’m devoted to keeping my eyes and heart wide open to those moments of resistance–of external chaos and shuffling, of uncertainty and confusion, of not getting what I wanted–because all of these experiences continue to show me where to bring further awareness so that I can create deeper alignment. 

A Few Questions to Bring Greater Awareness to Your Story

  • What life situations (external reality) aren’t quite aligned with how you would hope they’d be? Just list them out. Then consider, what within you and your inner narrative might be feeding that situation?
  • What are the labels you use to describe yourself (fixer, helper, self-reliant, always there for others, independent, etc.)? How might that label be giving you a never-ending set of circumstances for you to be that description? Is that how you wish to spend your next twenty years (or more)?
  • If you could release one aspect of your story, which is the one that would unlock tremendous energy and confidence that you could keep going and create a whole new story for yourself?

First, spend some time journaling on these questions. See where your inner teacher wants to speak up and guide you. Then consider: Who can you share these insights or this conversation with to put this energy out into the world? This will help you take ownership of the evolution of your story and even invite others to get on the bus with you. 

To hear more from Aaron, check out his interview on the One Idea Away Podcast!

Photo Credit: Yeshi Kangrang,